What you think about me…

Is none of my business…

“It is easy in the world to live after the world’s opinion, it is easy
 in solitude to live after your own;
but the great man is he who, in the midst of the world,
keeps with perfect sweetness
the independence of solitude.”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

“But I have a mind as well as you; I am not inferior to you.”  JOB 12:3

I have come to the conclusion that one of the purposes my soul is in this incarnation has to do with my own worthiness, celebrating my individuality and openly sharing the unique offering I bring just being who I am.

The journey to discover my authentic self has been an inward peeling away of erroneous perceptions built up over many years of assuming there was only one interpretation to a given set of circumstances. I came to believe that if you were pleased with me, I was good. If you didn’t like something I said, did, or wore, I was bad.

I believed for a long time that my childhood could be overcome by merely moving towards my desires. It seemed though, something would inevitably pull me back, set me back or I would lose interest.

In retrospect I have come to understand how deeply and completely I am personally responsible for my life. I carry, as we all do, layers and layers of beliefs, mostly unconscious, that, unless redefined or examined keep us where we are.

Plotinus said  ” An unexamined life is not worth living.”  I have met many people who, upon even superfluous self examination, halt their own process of spiritual evolution in some form or another. The territory entered in spiritual exploration and growth is foreign, often contrary to our beliefs.

Journey is the operative word here. The place to begin is right were you are. The clues to what your soul is calling to be examined are the triggers for upset, anger and sadness.  To paraphrase Debbie Ford, some one might be pushing your buttons, but you installed them. And you can uninstall them.

I grew up believing my worth was attached to what you thought about me. I created a superficially fabulous life endeavouring to please.

Today, I am exploring the authenticity of self and sharing it.